or like my friend says: "Fuck this sh*t, I don't like it - I'm out of here!"
I don't know about you, but I 've spent pretty lot of time talking with my friend about 2016, and how 2017 will be different. Many of them, including me, were having last year kinda let's say - "I can't wait once it's over" type of one. That's why I wish to have 2017 more thoughtful, deeper in conversation, wider in new experiences and most of all more self-respecting year.
Therefore I've summarised few "rules" I want to live according in these next 12 months (11 months), and you are reading the first of them.
“Where attention goes energy flows” and I strongly believe it.
This year, I would like to shift all my attention that I was randomly giving to almost any offered direction just to one certain point - to myself.
Not in egocentric, neither in a vain, selfish way. In order to grow, to make some progress, one should turn into himself, to exanimate the inner world a bit more closely, and to take a time for thinking (mostly to re-set old assumptions and beliefs to see if they are still accurate.)
The part of “committing to yourself" is to simply knowing yourself better, being kinder and more forgiving to your past mistakes by understanding why they have happened, and thanks to that being able to forgive also to the mistakes of others.
The biggest question is how to practice it in everyday life routine?
I figured out that these few bullet points are for me at least the most important one.
1. Finding time to be alone (or even better, stay single at least for a half year). Enjoy time just by yourself, go to the cinema alone, take yourself for a date and be happy like that. Some people are unable to spend any time alone. They have never been single not even for a year. Rushing from one relationship to another could be for sure fulfilling. But I think, only if you truly know how it is to be alone you can see your true colors.
2. Have you ever thought about your biggest weakness? What is making you unstable in the relationships and what triggers that in the work? Acknowledging weakness is the best way, how to turn it into your strength. ( I know, sounds so cliché - but there is a big power behind this realisation. If you accept the whole spectrum that your personality is build from, nobody can use it against you anymore)
3. Stop planning the future either stop going back in the past. One can't live in any of these. Which is certainly a pity - at least if you have such a great imagination as I do. In my future I look always stunning, my boyfriend is without any self-issues and it is always a spring time.
4. Distance yourself from energy suckers, or people who are constantly crossing your borderline. As I've learned last year, even the closest person will try to move your borders, when you let him/ (her). And that's one amazing lesson learned. When it comes to strangers we are more aware of ourself, more protective and more likely to defend ourself. When it comes to love life, we feel some kind of relief, taking oneself off the guard and just being vulnerable. And that's ok. But also misleading. We might overlooked the first signs of manipulation, boarder crossing or questioning your standards. The true lover/ friend doesn't need to test you to see if you are truly strong person, or to see how much you can bear. They know your value. That's the reason why they have chosen you to be in their inner circle. And if they somehow aren't sure about all mention above, just show them by walking away. Which brings me to nr. 5.
5. Learn when to say “ Fuck this shit, I m out of here” - leaving the situation, that doen’t feel good. That sounds so easy and clear and despite that it is such a complicated thing to do, especially when emotions are involved. (So basically all the time?)
6. Remember that you should always be seeking for progress in any time and any circumstances. One can't go backward, everything has to evolve and everything always is.
Set yourself a goals for a month, a year, maybe even for the next 2 years. Oh, sure- they will certainly change and you most likely won't reach out to your 2 years goal, not because you aren't good enough - because something different might happen. And that's normal. Having some goals is the only way how to know where one wants to go. It's like on the foggy day. You might not see the whole way inrfont of you, but you know that you direction is the right one. And that is enough!
7. Think about your body and your mind as some kind of tools! And use them! One should be searching for the quality. As I want to be and added value to somebodies else life, the same I expect from others. Fair deal- win win- and most of all the biggest gift. That's why I've promised myself to use my body and my mind as some kind of "tools". And to use them in the best way I could. "Creating myself". I actually love this two word very much.
My psysical body was given to me by my biologic predispositions (if that was up to me, I would add a few extra centimetres, so maybe next time :)?) However, how gracefully I'm gonna grow old is up to me. I can also have a certain IQ and great EQ but that means nothing, if I m not searching for new ways how to educate myself and how to feel more for others.
8. In my late 20s – committing to myself means profoundly also work life. Working more on the project I truly believe in and I feel inner enthusiasm about. Finding enjoyable work and being better and better in it is for me probably one of the best things one can do for himself anyway. Sometimes it might be tricky, sometimes you actually dont know in what field you want to work or in which city to live in. But that's ok. Everything is figure - outable :) So just commit to yourself, put the safety boots on and work.
Thank you for your time and photo: Alexandra Hrašková